At some point in our lives, many women begin to feel smaller. Not physically, but emotionally, energetically, and internally.
When Silence Becomes Easier
You may notice it in subtle ways. You hesitate before speaking. You second-guess your opinions. You defer to others, even when you know better. Over time, confidence erodes, and a quiet voice inside says, “It’s not worth saying,” or worse, “Who am I to speak up?”
I see this pattern often in my work as a career and life coach, especially among women in midlife and beyond. Through years of relationships, workplaces, caregiving roles, and life experiences, many of us have learned to soften, accommodate, or stay silent to keep the peace or meet expectations. Gradually, our voice gets tucked away.
And when we lose our voice, the impact reaches far beyond communication.
Losing Yourself in the Silence
When your voice is muted, decisions feel harder. You may stay in situations that no longer fit. Jobs, roles, or relationships because it feels safer not to rock the boat. You might avoid advocating for yourself, setting boundaries, or exploring what you actually want next. Over time, this can lead to feeling invisible, stuck, or disconnected from your sense of purpose.
Losing your voice doesn’t happen overnight. It happens in moments when you weren’t heard, when speaking up had consequences, when it felt easier to shrink than to stand firm. But here’s the good news: your voice isn’t gone. It’s simply out of practice.
Reclaiming Your Voice Is Very Much Like Exercising a Muscle
At first, it may feel uncomfortable or awkward. You may doubt your strength. But once you begin to practice, develop, and intentionally train this muscle, you will feel stronger. With repetition comes confidence. With confidence comes clarity. And with clarity you gain the courage to step fully into your truth.
Three Exercises to Reclaim Your Voice
1. The Daily Truth Check-In
Once a day, ask yourself: What do I really think or feel about this? Write it down without editing or censoring. You don’t need to share it with anyone. This practice strengthens your inner voice; the foundation for speaking outwardly with confidence.
2. Practice Saying It Out Loud
Choose one low-risk situation each week where you intentionally share your opinion, whether it’s suggesting a restaurant, offering a perspective in a meeting, or expressing a preference with a friend. Confidence grows through action, not perfection.
3. Rewrite the Old Narrative
Notice the phrases that stop you from speaking: “I don’t want to be difficult,” “It’s probably not important,” “Someone else knows more.” Challenge them. Ask: What would I say if my voice mattered? Because it does.
As you continue to strengthen this muscle, something powerful happens. You stop selling yourself short. You trust your perspective. You show up more fully in your life. And yes, you begin to sparkle in a way that is authentic, grounded, and unmistakably you.
It’s time to reclaim your voice and step into your power.
I’d Love to Hear from You:
Where do you feel you’ve lost your voice, and how has that impacted your life? Please share in the comments, you may be surprised how many women recognize themselves in your story.
